What a wedding!

I have been to a handful of inspirational and touching weddings, but the wedding I went to on the 29th of July was without question the most unique and appropriate for the couple. Gwen Hobbs and Eric Bostard who own Redpoint Climbers Supply in Terrebonne Oregon tied the knot at sunrise on top of the Monkey Face pillar in Smith Rock State Park. Gwen's mother and sister surprised her the day before the wedding and my boyfriend officiated the service. As if that wasn't enough awesome, Gwen and Eric swung on the 100ft pendulum Monkey Swing together just hours after exchanging their vows. 

It was awe-inspiring to see the community come out to support them especially given how early it was! 

The officiant and I decided it was probably okay to also step off the cliff on the Monkey swing after the newlyweds tested it. Among the others who jumped; a mother and her 7 year old daughter, Gwen's mother and sister, and a handful of other brave guys and gals. 

I have personally struggled with the idea of marriage for most of my life, but seeing more of my friends come up with unique and brilliant ways to represent their relationships and the lives they want to have, makes the idea of nuptials slightly less terrifying.

Thank you Gwen and Eric for being the pinnacle of what is possible in a functional fun-loving relationship and for setting the bar high.   

A different kind of adventure!

So... I bought a house!

This is a very different sort of adventure for someone who identifies quite strongly with her independence and wanderlust tendencies. A year ago I would have never thought this day would come, but here it is. I am a homeowner and I'll admit it's a bit scary, but I've had a perspective shift. While the spontaneous traveler in me dreads the idea of having anything "permanent" the rational side of me recognizes a house as an investment and a home-base I can personalize the shit out of! I can paint, design, and construct as I see fit.

The fact that I have a nice long garage to put an epic wall/training facility in and a room for a studio is a huge bonus as well.  

Change makes most people a bit anxious, especially drastic perspective shifts. I think I have convinced my travel bug that it's okay to have a storage unit in the form of a house though... We'll see how she feels in a few months though?! 

Official West Face Variation Trip Report!

“Breathe. Breathe. Just breathe,” I say to myself in a reassuring loop as I get frustrated and scared trying to place an orange number 3 cam in the crack, my legs shaking and tired.  “Breathe.” My breath is one of those simple things I constantly take for granted when I’m at dirt level. “Breathe.” I let my body relax, soften my focus, slow down, and gently arrange the cam back to its happy place. I am on the second pitch of the West Face Variation on the Monkey Face and this is the first time I have ever lead a trad climb in it’s entirety from ground to summit. That orange cam I was freaking out over was a good placement before I started messing with it and shaking myself silly. I’m still learning.

I make it to Bohn Street and belay my boyfriend Mike up to me. He’s one of my favorite climbing partners. Mike knows when to shout encouragement, when to keep his lips zipped, and makes me feel strong and powerful on the sharp end. When he reaches me at the belay station, he gives me a positive critique on my pieces, and takes a seat next to me in the bright spring sun. It’s empowering to switch roles. Normally I’m following Mike up the harder trad pitches, or we will swing leads on sport climbs, but this is new territory for both of us.

The next two pitches are challenging for different reasons. The aid ladder that leaves Bohn Street and finishes in the Monkey’s mouth is an exhausting cluster of webbing, draws, beaners and cursing topped off with a not-so-graceful flop to the anchors. The next pitch, aptly named “panic point,” is a highly-exposed, airy sport-pitch to the nose block of the Monkey. This is where breathing comes in handy again. The climbing isn’t difficult, but the obvious 170-foot drop to the ground out the Monkey’s mouth instantly puts my head in check. My breath and I keep our composure, though, and are blinded by the sun as we met the Monkey’s nose. One more little pitch to the summit and I had successfully lead my boyfriend up a classic route of trad, sport, and aid climbing.

At the summit, Mike laughed at me, blissed out and vibrating with joy as we soaked up my victory in the sunshine.  Before we rappelled down, I had to do a handstand on top to seal the celebration. Once our soles were joined with the dirt again, I stared back up at the Monkey. I just climbed that! I lead every pitch--all of it! I placed my own gear, got scared, took my time, trusted my pieces, and belayed up my second. I stood on the summit, was blinded by the sun, the skyline, and soaked in the warmth of my achievement. With the exception of borrowing my boyfriend’s rack, that was all me, and it felt exceptional.

I have felt empowered at other points in my life: When I sent my first highball, when I went through security at PDX to start my solo travels around the world, and when I cursed at a man in perfect Italian who had been harassing me for an hour. I think everyone wants to feel powerful. I think everyone needs that sense of invincibility with just the right dose of reality. I find that sense of empowerment by challenging gender norms, challenging cultural expectations of what I “should do,” and of course, challenging my perceptions of what I think I can do. This process of seeking empowerment is not always a smooth one. But, when I get scared, frustrated, or start to shake, all I have to do is remind myself to breathe.    

Born on the 4th of July!

It’s true, I am an independence baby, firecracker, and red, white and blue child. It’s a fun birthday to have too because as long as I’m in the United States I get the day off work. If I’m really lucky, like this last weekend, I can even squeeze in an extra day and go off into the wilderness for 4 days!

Mike and I made the treck to Stanley Idaho for a climbing adventure weekend in the Sawtooths. We took the shuttle across Red Fish Lake and were greeted by a string of red ribbons and notes from my mom. She had snuck across the lake on an earlier boat and surprised me with a little scavenger hunt. Well done mother!

So the three of us Mike, Mom and I hiked up to the Elephant’s Perch and Saddleback Lakes in the Sawtooth Mountains. It took about 3 hours and in the last mile we gained about 1400 ft of elevation. The lakes though, and the views… wow totally speechless! We had an amazing campsite at the base of the Perch, I slept so well, we ate well, and took a mellow start to our climbing day.

Although Myopia, a 9 pitch 5.11a, has great reviews and is a supposed three star route, it was not exactly my cup of tea. The majority of it was laybacking, and blocky, and I was just not in the mood for it. Luckily Mike’s attitude and the views saved the day. We made it to the top after 3 luna bars, 3 tubes of shot blocks and 3 liters of water in 10 hours. It was a long day… I’m okay with days like that though, it was hard, it hurt and at times it made me want to cry or punch things, but we made it in good spirits and smiles. Not all days will be perfect, but there are shiny spots and we chose to hold on to the shiny spots. Oh and we saw a huge mountain goat!

The rest of the weekend was full of skinny dipping in alpine cold water, naps, walks, photos, fishing, and fun conversations. I have had a fair few birthdays now and I feel lucky to say I have spent the majority of them in the mountains. It’s a great way to recharge, reflect, stay grounded, and re-caliber my perspective.

I am so thankful for the mountains and their fresh air, my mom and her amazing light, my boyfriend and his killer attitude and climbing skilz, and my birthday for providing the best possible day for me to celebrate life and adventure.       

Time

Something we’re all familiar with, have our own thoughts about, use, lose, and chase. Something we love, curse, crave, and fight with. Something we try to control, try to let go of, bend, adjust and trick. There are a lot of ways to look at and think about time. According to google time is “the indefinite continued progress of existence and events in the past, present, and future regarded as a whole.” It’s also a measurement, plan or schedule.

My relationship with and definition of time is constantly evolving. I usually think about time in relation to a balancing act, as if I only have so many eggs I can juggle, set down, toss in the air, or hold in my hands. I’m not all that good at juggling in real life so the metaphor of juggling eggs might not be the most appropriate... But what if I was to say those eggs are plastic easter eggs with sweets inside?! That way if they drop and break open, I have one less egg and a sugary treat! Dropping too many eggs would obviously lead to a risk of diabetes, or I could take the time to set all my other eggs down and put the broken egg back together treat safely nested inside.

What I’m getting at with this very convoluted metaphor is that I have recently come to the conclusion that the perfect balancing act of time is unrealistic. Sometimes my energy will feel evenly distributed, but most of the time not and that’s okay. I have to be okay with dropping an egg once in a while and then giving it all of my attention. Right now that egg is my video project of my climb at Smith Rock.

I received a Live Your Dream grant from the American Alpine Club earlier this year and completed my climb of the West Face of the Monkey as part of my project. It was an amazing day, I got some great footage, and I have been putting all of my extra time and energy over the last week into finishing the video trip report.

Video is a whole new beast for me, and it has eaten up my entire existence since I started. However with my new found acceptance and relationship with time, I’m not beating myself up about not taking advantage of the sunshine or missing out on one climbing trip, because the summer is long and there will be more time for those things. Right now my video egg has the spotlight and I am giving it all of my attention.

I have to have these sorts of conversations with myself often, silly metaphors included, because I love to do so much in so many different directions. I want to take on as many eggs as possible! I want to participate, adventure, relax, read, celebrate, sleep, cook, paint, dance, climb, and squeeze it all into one day! Sometimes it's possible, and sometimes I have to remind myself that it's okay and that regardless of how I try to spend, use and take advantage of my time it will carry on indefinitely.   

 

Falling is Part of the Process

Falling, failing, missing the goal, shot, net, hole, hold, catch. Losing, tripping, crashing, hitting the ground, all of these things happen and all of these things are part of the process.

This last weekend was my first real trad climbing trip to Index, that’s all we did, place gear and climb cracks. Our first climb was called Aries. It’s a 3 pitch 5.8 with a wide start, a flared chimney, and a bit of a roof. All things I’m not super stoked on or good at. So I was a bit stunned by Mike’s reply when I asked him who was leading what pitches. “You’re leading all of them” he said. Shit… I’m getting more comfortable with placing gear and climbing cracks, but a lot of it still feels foreign and up until now I had never taken a fall on gear before.  

I racked my gear, started up the wide section, placed a blue number 3 cam and tried to get my fists to fit in the crack. None of this was graceful by the way. I was cursing under my breath, huffing, pissed and staring at that cam thinking “I’m totally about to take a fall on this… Fuck it! Here we go…” I groveled my way up a few moves past my piece, was smearing with my left foot and trying to find something substantial for my right, but it was awkward. I was almost there, fingers touching the hold that would secure my passage on to the ledge in front of me, and my foot popped. Falling is part of the process.

I gave a bit of a frustrated cry as my gear and Mike caught me. I sat there in my harness out of breath, frustrated, panting, and a bit excited honestly. YES! It totally holds! I mean I knew logically that cams are supposed to work, but it’s another thing entirely to have the experience of one working. I looked down and had a very nice three tiered rope burn from my ankle half way up my calf with a definite bruise and bloody knee pending. Mike was stoked, I was stoked, we laughed, I caught my breath and got to the ledge my second go. The rest of the climb was great too, I had fun in the try-hard frustrating sense, but ultimately I felt really good about my performance and my efforts.

Climbing cracks still feels like another language in many ways, but I’ve got the falling figured out so it’s only a matter of time before the rest of the equation is translated.


Maitri Wedding

It's hard to say what my favorite part about my work is. There are so many elements to my process, image collection, cutting, arranging, organizing, collaging, sculpting, painting and of course delivering the final piece. With my Wedding series work I think the amount of time I spend with all of the smiling photos is a narrow second to delivering the final piece to the newlyweds.

I spend at least 30 hours with a 2x3 poster size piece and the majority of that time is spent smiling. It's a rough job really. I have to stare at, work with and arrange a couples most precious, joyful, happy moments they have captured on film and it makes me constantly smiley! As it turns out there is a little science behind the act of smiling. Did you know it's practically impossible to not smile back at a smiling face without conscious effort? 

Over the last month and a half I have been smiling at and with my friends Jess, Taylor and their radiant family. In my initial sketching stages, it was imperative for me to find an image that both symbolized and spoke to the fullness of this couple and their journey together. They are both passionate, strong, magnetic beings that draw people in like bug lights with a happy zap. They place an emphasis on growth and self-reflection and have the joint responsibility of nourishing four energetic children. 

Knowing what I do about their characters and intentions it was easy to see them and their journey reflected in the symbol of a tree, but I wanted to further emphasize the act of coming together to create something new. In this piece Maitri (which is a Sanskrit word meaning unconditional love and friendship with oneself and is also now their last name) I decided to have a bright seedling tree in the foreground to show the beginning of their relationship and a larger full tree in the background to show the inevitable growth and longevity of their relationship.  

Thank you again Jess and Taylor for allowing me to be part of your journey and share in your smiles! 


Weekend Warrior

Urban Dictionary has a long list of definitions for "weekend warrior." The most popular being "a person who regularly parties on weekends."  I certainly don't "party" in the traditional Urban Dictionary context, but I have my own malleable definition and try to celebrate every moment of my weekends in the fullest adventure style possible. 

To recap the month of May... 2500 trip miles, 615 photos taken, 11 days climbing outside, 4 states, 3 hot springs, 2 new phones, 1 yoga retreat, countless bruises, and more laughter then I have embraced in a very long time. My weekends, my evenings, all of my time is meant to be full of awesome! I have chosen to have what I call a big-girl job and that takes up about 40 hours a week, but there is plenty of time left over to "party!"

I'll admit it is hard sometimes to get home from a trip after midnight, unpack the car, make food for the next day, and shower only to get 5 hours of sleep and still get things accomplished on Monday. But it's worth it. It's worth it to have my ankles bruised to the point of limiting my professional foot attire, my muscles ache to the point of limited movement and my car/road-trip-rig smell to the point of limited breathing and almost embarrassment. I'm not embarrassed though and I know I'm not the only one that lives this way.

Some people like myself live many lives in a week. I have my business casual life during the weekdays and on the weekends I have my wanderlust adventure warrior life. There are moments of frustration on sunny days behind my desk, moments of anguish on rainy days hiding under rocks, and moments of chaos when I can't seem to counterbalance my two lives, but again it's worth it. I learn more and more about myself as I transition between my two lives, reflect on the importance and benefits of each, and try to grow and adjust as necessary.

So for the time being I'm stoked on my business casual/adventure warrior juggling act and since nothing is really set in stone, if I choose to take an extended trip or spend the weekend at home in my hammock that will just have to fit into my definition of "party."


Spring Thing Slideshow

I can't believe it has almost been a month since the Smith Rock Spring Thing! I still have rocks stuck in the treads of my shoes, sage stuck to the back seat of my car, and photos on my camera that still need to be processed, but I have done a quick edit of my slideshow presentation!   

The Smith Rock Spring Thing is a rad fundraising and park maintenance day that rewards it's volunteers with food, goodies, raffles, and a live auction of awesome gear. This year Mike Doyle also gave an entertaining slideshow on his Smith Rock climbing endeavors and his epic battle and eventual triumph over Necessary Evil 5.14c in the Virginia River Gorge. Congrats again Mike!

 Thanks again to everyone who showed up to volunteer and if you missed my part of the slideshow, here it is... Sorry about the few "ums" I was a tad nervous.